FHM magazine article (July 2000)

Q & A Dermot O'Leary

The T4 and Bigger Breakfast presenter on chicken suits, stalking Cat Deeley and fake white leather espadrilles...

You are well-known for your short-croped hair - is that a reaction against some horror-story bouffant in the past?

In my bizarre rugby-playing phase of the early Nineties, my hair suddenly branched out into a huge afro. I caught myself in a window and thought, "God, I'm going to have to get this cut." I went to a hairdresser but she made a pig's arse of it, so I went round my mates', shaved it all off, and it's been like that ever since. I really like it now.

There was a character in hilarious Antipodean comedy The Paul Hogan Show, whose wardrobe was just a big row of shirts with the sleeves cut off. Given your on-screen attire, would we be right to assume your wardrobe is just a big line of T-shirts?

What? I never wear T-shirts! My wardrobe is just a massive row of short-steeved shirts - all from Nigel Hall. He just seems to make stuff that fits my stocky frame.

Do you ever wear brogues, or are you a strict trainer man?

I'm much more of a shoe man. I'll never forget Nick Moran saying, "What, are trainers, except a load of synthetic crap glued together?" and he's right. But I rarely get the chance to wear shoes. I've got some great Patrick Cox ones, though.

How do you deal with the horror that is an invite which says, "Dress: Smart casual"?

Yeah, that is a total nightmare. As it happens I've recently got some stuff from Nicole Farhi which was expressly for dealing with invitations to smart casual. I got a really nice jacket which straddles the hinterland between smart and casual, and some nice black linen trousers. So suddenly I've gone from having a total void where smart casual was concerned, to being fully equipped instead.

Before these sensible purchases, were you ever forced to sport the criminal combination of a pair of shiny loafers, perhaps an orange button-down shirt and some dark slacks?

No, that's never happened. I don't know who started the fashion to wear shirts un-tucked, but if you do it, you've got to wear the right shirt. I love it when you see these townie kids going out on a Friday night - they've obviously bought shirts that are meant to be worn with suits and they're walking round with them down to their knees. It's destroying the good name that once was Ben Sherman.

What's the worst thing you've had to wear on telly?

There's nothing worse than The Bigger Breakfast chicken outfit. But when I worked on a show called Buzz, they only gave me £100 to buy five shirts with. So I was walking around in SU214 and it tricked me - the shop secretly morphs into Top Man. I mean girls can get away with wearing stuff from Top Shop, but if you're a bloke, and your mates ask where you got something, you end up mumbling "Eh, I forget" - but everyone knows I forget" is a euphemism for Top Man.

Obviously you have to get up early for The Bigger Breakfast and T4 - what grooming tips do you have that will help-our readers look sprightly in the mornings?

I always try to give myself about three-quarters of-an-hour to gather my thoughts. Definitely a shave the night before, a quick shower and a protein drink - Dunnes River Nourishment in either raspberry or chocolate is best.

What item of childhood fashion would you bring back today if you had the chance?

I had these lovely elasticated white shoes that were kind of fake leather. They were fairly Miami Vice as shoes go, but they could also double up as a trainer for running - very Eighties. They were espadrille-esque. I'd bring those back in a second. But I think they'd be reserved for me or Jarvis Cocker.

Apparently handbags for men are in this year. Will you be draping one over your arm?

That should be a lynchable offence. Militia mobs should come back - they could hunt down the men that actually have handbags. They may be useful for the Man United team though - they seem to like them.

Is the wearing of a rugby shirt in a place in any way excusable?

Absolutely not - there's no way anyone should be tolerated who does that. I read a great quote the other day: that only stockbrokers with wide arses should be allowed to wear them in public and I whole-heartedly agree.

If you were told that you had 24 hours 1h what clothes would you ask to be buried in?

Well, if I only had 24 hours I think I'd probably stalk Cat Deeley, and then I'd definitely be buried in a decent suit. In fact, I'd like to be measured for a bespoke suit as a dead man, then dressed. And of course I'd have to Irish Tricolour draped across my coffin.

Guns across the top?

Ha! Well maybe a couple of hurley sticks.

Speaking of terrorists, would it be a pair of tights over your head, the cowboy-style around the nose or the traditional Irish balaclava for you?

The traditional Irish Balactava would be tempting, but I wouldn't want to give away where I come from. So I'd go for the "Hole-in-the-wall-gang" look with the cowboy scarf - you can say a lot with the eyes that way.

Interview by Dave McLaughlin.